nicht angemeldet
...and the answer is UNIX?.
Hallo,
man haben die einen Bart. Wie die hier:
Here is a list I compiled of UNIX commands that return witty error messages.
Some of the commands don't return the same error messages, depending
which OS you're running (ie SunOS, HP/UX, Ultrix, etc.). Have fun!Note that the '%' prompt indicates the C shell, while the '$' prompt
indicates the Bourne shell. Go ahead and try some ...If you know of any other funny UNIXisms that aren't here, please send them to
jimbo@statsci.com
+------------------------------ cut here -----------------------------------+
% make fire
Make: Don't know how to make fire. Stop.% why not?
No match.% gotta light?
No match.% !1984
1984: Event not found. # (on some systems)% How's my lovemaking?
Unmatched '.% "How would you rate Bush's incompetence?
Unmatched ".% [Where is Jimmy Hoffa?
Missing ].% [Where is my brain?
Missing ].% ^How did the sex change^ operation go?
Modifier failed.% ^How did the sex change operation go?
Bad substitute.% If I had a ( for every $ Congress spent, what would I have?
Too many ('s.% man: why did you get a divorce?
man:: Too many arguments.% %blow
%blow: No such job.% (-
(-: Command not found.% sh
$ PATH=pretending! /usr/ucb/which sense
no sense in pretending!$ mkdir matter; cat >matter
matter: cannot create% cd /tmp
% touch this; chmod 000 this
% ln -s /usr/bin/touch U
% U this
U: cannot touch this: no write permission% rm meese-ethics
rm: meese-ethics nonexistent% cd ~god
Unknown user: god.% ar m God
ar: God does not exist% make love
Make: Don't know how to make love. Stop.% sleep with me
bad character% ^What is saccharine?
Bad substitute.% drink < bottle; opener
bottle: cannot open
opener: not found% alias alias alias
alias: Too dangerous to alias that.% cat catfood
cat: cannot open catfood% cat "food in cans"
cat: can't open food in cans% nice man woman
No manual entry for woman.% man pussy
No manual entry for pussy.% rm God
rm: God nonexistent% ar r God
ar: creating God% Unmatched ".
Unmatched ".% write desert
desert is not logged on.% man you
No manual entry for you.% !bluemoon
bluemoon: Event not found.% scan for <<"Arnold Schwarzenegger"^J^D
"Arnold Schwarzenegger": << terminator not found% cat 'the can of tuna'
cat: cannot open the can of tuna% rm Quayle-brains
rm: Quayle-brains nonexistent% cat "door: paws too slippery"
cat: cannot open door: paws too slippery% look into "my eyes"
look: cannot open my eyes% lost
lost: not found% make war
Make: Don't know how to make war. Stop.% mkdir yellow_pages; cat > yellow_pages
yellow_pages: Is a directory%touch me
%chmod 000 me
%touch me
touch: cannot touch me: permission denied% ar x "my love life"
ar: my love life does not exist% ar x "matey, the treasure"
ar: matey, the tresure does not exist% talk Gorvachev@Kremlin
talk: Kremlin: Can't figure out network address.% talk Comrade Khruchev
[Your party is not logged on]make "bottle open"
make "heads or tails of all this"
make love
make mistake
make sense
man woman
man -kisses dog% echo'[q]sa[ln0=aln256%Pln256/snlbx]sb3135071790101768542287578439snlbxq'|dc
GET A LIFE!% ping elvis.rice.edu | awk '{print substr($1,1,5), $2, $3}'
elvis is alive% finger body-of-christ@bread-jar.mass
Unknown host% finger huge-keg-party@big-house
Unknown host* % make ' ' bang ' ' with gun
* make: Fatal error: Don't know how to make target ` '% rm meese-ethics
rm: meese-ethics nonexistent% ar m God
ar: God does not exist% "How would you rate Quayle's incompetence?
Unmatched ".% ^How did the sex change^ operation go?
Modifier failed.% If I had a ( for every $ the Congress spent, what would I have?
Too many ('s.% make love
Make: Don't know how to make love. Stop.% sleep with me
bad character% got a light?
No match.% man: why did you get a divorce?
man:: Too many arguments.% ^What is saccharine?
Bad substitute.% %blow
%blow: No such job.% (-
(-: Command not found.$ PATH=pretending! /usr/ucb/which sense
no sense in pretending!$ drink < bottle; opener
bottle: cannot open
opener: not found$ mkdir matter; cat >matter
matter: cannot create
;-))
Gruß
Axel